Life.

Life.

What is it? 

What's the point in it?

Why do we live it?

Why do we try?

So far Life hasn't been that bad.I broke up with Lauren again.And I got my heart broken by Matty. It sucked.We're kind of okay now. Bassically he said we should just be friends. Not the close friends we were but friends that don't call each other babe or baby or say we love each other. I was so heartbroken I was saying over and oer again I was like Please Matty please don't do this. Then he started saying how he didn't want to hurt me anymore. But he doesn't get it I find him worth it. I love him enough where I forgive him like every time he hurts me. He's the first guy to show me what Love is. I swear he's the only guy I've fallin in love with. Like really fallen in love. I mean there was Zack that I could have swore I was in love with but in the end he was just a crush. Plus he was two timing me so it doesn't really matter.But for some reason I kind of still miss him.... He was so nice to me.... I just wish things didn't end the way they did between me and him. But anyways back to the topic Matty.. Life. Him ... Love... So much to life. I just don't know what to do somtimes. I just want to be with Matty. Only Matty... Cause he's the only guy I love. I still Love Lauren but I can't be with her cause my Love for Matty is too strong.I love my Stepmom. She's so cool. I know that was random. But she's right next to me watching T.V... Anyways I'm gonna go. I love Matty<3

I don't know what to do anymore

Should I stay with you?
I'm not faithfull though...
Do you love me anyways?
You really are too good for me.
I wonder what you think....

Well I've managed to ask her out again after we broke up she said sure why not.I don't know what to do! I love her and I love him... I love them both but I love her too much to hurt her. I'm not really in the mood to write but anyways I'll post somthing later as if anyone reads this.

I've been thinking...

I've been thinking...

You and me?

Yeah you!

We should be us ;)

So maybe it's crazy

But I'm pretty crazy myself ;)

Hahaha I jus made that up! Bad I know but Still... ANYWAYS I think I should be able to go out with Matty but that's just me I mean cmon I totally wanted him first and then his gf took him which totally sucked ass! I mean awwww Cmon! Anyways I love this boy sooo much!! He's so special to me. My mom actually hugged me today. Oooo  I want a brownie now. Lol Anywho I wrote some more poems which I shall post soon not like anyone reads this anyways :P

Us?

Us
we used to be us
you and me
no longer are we us
no longer are we you and me
now we are separete


Yeah we broke up yesterday. It's kind of whatever in a way... I can't help it. I had to be honest with her I had to to admit I love someone else but I love her too. I didn't want to break up with her cause I loved her too much but then again I love Matty ... So in the end we decided it's best for us to break up. To go our seperate ways. Lol well what pissed me off is she said I was just using her. She was just a game. When she wasn't she was everything to me. It's just I ended up falling back in love with Matty. I couldn't help it.. He never stopped loving me even after he got his gf. So why should I have stopped loving him? I know it's wrong and everything but we can't help it... It's like we were the ones who were supposed to be going out not him and his gf. Oh well I don't mind as long as he still loves me... Last night was amazing talking to him :) Somthing I will never ever forget. :)

Love Symphony

We were both Musicians

Falling in and out of Love

Our love like a symphony

Exept we called the shots

No composer Nor director

For we controlled our Love

No books nor music

for we played it by ear

All our passion and Love 

going into the Rhythm

Making our beautifull Symphony

Him

I love him

I want him

I need him

I wonder if

He loves me

If he wants me

If he needs me

Well it's not really much of a poem it's just somthing quick I made up like just now. Anyways It's about Matty. I love him.. Alot and he doesn't even realize it. Well he knows I love him but I'm not sure he knows just how much I love him. He's so amazing. He's always always listened to me. And been there. I could be on the phone crying my eyes out and he's on the other side just saying its okay and he's there. He's amazingly funny and always telling jokes but he's never mean. He's so deep and not shallow like the boys at school. He loves poetry and the poems I make. He's even wrote a few poems for me about how I saved him from the darkness blah blah blah. He's just... amazing and sweet and he's always calling me beautiful. But he's not mine... He's hers. Her she stole him from me. I loved him and then when I turned my back for a moment she took him. Now it's gonna be a long time before I get him back. But I have someone... Lauren. She's amazing and sweet but she's not him... I would never break up with her just because I don't want to break her heart. We both have someone.. He still likes me.. But not enough to break up with Aleshia.. Even when he did he didn't do it. Doesn't matter cause by the time I'm 16 he'll be mine :) Hopefully if we still stay in touch... Oh man this boy is so amazing and yes he's like a dream come true but hopefully it's not just a dream...

Love Struck

The night is Beautifull and I sit here alone

Watching the stars glistening

I sit patiently waiting for you.

I start to walk, when I feel a hand with its fingers

entwined with mine.

I turn to look at you and

I stare into your eyes getting lost in their beauty. 

You pull me in close and my heart skips a beat.

A kiss...

That was all it took for you to get me under your spell

I was Lovestruck

Dreaming of You :))

We strolled threw the streets of Paris
  Hands entwined and never apart.
Smiling Happily like young couples in love

We strolled threw the gardens,
 Then kissed in the moonlight, 
And hugged with the bright lights.

You held me close as we danced,
        Under the starts,
and threw the allyways.

Our love was like a symphony,
      Controlled by Musicians,
And we were the Musicians.